What if Richard Simmons Was Jesus?

     This thought occurred to me while watching the television, I saw one of those commercials with fat people and how Richard Simmons had made them thin.  They were crying and hugging him and talking about him like he was the greatest being.  This got my mind working, "is this man Jesus" I wondered.  Think about it, he makes the fat thin and the straight gay, you see him all over the place from T.V. to books.

     How does one figure this out, do we go to a church and buy a five dollar son of god test, with a free plastic cross, or do we just act as if he were the son of god.  If you compare pictures of him to Jesus they look some what alike, I mean the pictures of Jesus we have today might misrepresent him a little.  Richard Simmons son of god, in his short shorts, wife beater shirt and fro.  He would be the most unique religious icon.

     Now my last thought is on all of the television hosts that rip on him and crack jokes at his expense.  I think the day he realizes his true powers will be on one of these shows, Jay Leno will call him fatty and all of a sudden blood will start pouring out of Jays face, and Richard will start dancing on water.  But until then I will just sit around and speculate.